Sunday, January 8, 2012

Collar and its meaning

According to wikipedia: "A collar is a device of any material placed around the neck of the submissive partner. It is also a term used to show ownership of one partner by another. A person wearing a collar to symbolize their relationship with another is said to be collared."

There's more to it than that.

Being "owned"..becoming the property of a dominant Woman...being "collared" by her...what does it mean? what does it consist of? (I'm not talking about a temporary leather collar during a scene. I'm talking ownership.)

They make a commitment to one another long term.
- The submissive male pledges to only serve and be loyal to the dominant Woman. He strives to do his best to obey and put a smile on her face. And to make her proud of him in all that he does. he belongs to Her.
- The dominant Woman pledges to accept his submission, cherish it and take the responsibility of truly training him to her liking. She acknowleges that he is now part of her..her property..a reflection of her. He is under her care.

Possible outward signs of their union:
-signing a slave contract specifying their roles and responsibilities
-marks of ownership (ie: tattoo of her choosing on him, or special jewelry to be worn always such as a special collar, necklace or bracelet to symbolize their relationship, special piercing, etc.)
-possibly registering her slave on slaveregister.com.
-possibly a collaring ceremony (a commitment ceremony in the bdsm community usually among close kinky friends. I have also known of a few couples who just held the ceremony themselves with no witnesses...just for them.)
-if they are in love, possibly also an engagement later.

The submissive male should be proud to be owned by her and the dominant Woman should be proud of owning him.

As one male said: “the collar is really a symbol of devotion to one whom you have agreed to partner with. The exchange of power between a Dominant and submissive is a mutually agreed upon unbalancing of control. It is a akin to the traditional wedding ring in non-BDSM or ‘vanilla’ relationships, except a bit sexier.”

Also when at bdsm events/parties, the collar represents that he is owned and not to be touched without his Mistress' permission. And collared subs are envied by other subs still searching for their Owner.

Feelings and meaning associated with the actual Collar:
"Many times Dominant gives the collar with pride. The Dominant might view the collar as a symbol of ownership or surrender of the submissive or slave. It can become a symbol of their union, agreement, and their dedication to a common goal. Submissive often wear it in devotion. Submissives can feel strength and security in the collar - thus in their power exchange. It can evoke in a slave the profound depth of service to their Owner. It can evoke feelings of their calling into slavery. And serve as a reminder of place and status in the power exchange. For others it might feel just as a toy - such as a flogger or something else used in a scene. And alternately a collar might feel like protection and love for others. It can be freeing to have that collar around one's neck because it means that you are not denying your authentic self."

Related links:
-A collar is more than strip of leather/cloth/chain
-What is a collaring ceremony? Includes sample collaring vows
-More links on collaring

A slave ownership tattoo with his Mistress' name
and a SlaveRegister number

A collared male slave with ownership tattoos in the kanji japanese writing language. The symbols at the top mean "submission". There's also the bdsm symbol. And the tattoos at the bottom mean "slave and servant". His Mistress also put a tramp stamp decorative design on his lower back too since as you can see, he's her slut.

3 comments:

  1. Dear Mistress Lisa,

    Very nice post. Many of the elements and emotions you evoke are also brought up in a recent post on our blog about the 1st Anniversary of me wearing an Eternity Collar for my Goddess...

    http://mount-latmus.blogspot.com/2012/01/eternity-collar-one-year-anniversary-e.html

    All the Best to You!

    Dymion
    Owned & collared by Goddess Selena

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  2. I'm glad you enjoyed it and commented, Dymion. I read your blog posts too. very nice. I felt the love and proudness you have in being collared by your owner, Goddess Selena. So nice. =)

    Dymion's first post about first putting on the eternity collar is at:
    http://mount-latmus.blogspot.com/2010/12/eternity-collar-e.html

    He wears the black Phantom eternity collar sold on:
    http://www.eternitycollars.com

    By the way, I've heard of other male subs who had no problems wearing that same collar under their clothes in public too after being formally collared by their owner.

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  3. Very revealing feeling as you quote, "... I'm not talking about a temporary leather collar during a scene. I'm talking ownership ..."

    In a real sense a collar is a dedication to and from between two people. No so-called contract makes a differnce except to deliniate the terms. No legal or moral enforcements apply. Sadly, at some point, one or the other party calls it quits.

    ReplyDelete